Short & Sweet...

I suppose I could use those words to describe myself, but that is actually a new rule of thumb for my blog posts. It is also one of the most overused phrases that was used during my course of undergraduate studies as a J.I.T. (journalist-in-training) but a phrase much appreciated now. I can be a little long winded when it comes to airing things out, and I definitely can't promise that rule will apply to every post, however when the rule applies I promise to make it count! I'm tempted to carry on right now, but I won't.... K.I.S.S. bka "keep it simple stupid" aka "keep it short sweetie" #yeahisaid!t

If Sex Can Be Reinvented...

Then there's hope for the nightlife...right?

I can remember that a part of my wanting to be an adult when I was younger, was wanting to get dressed up and  going to clubs and bars. Oh how my mind has changed and I'm not even 25, but I suppose I'm a "tween" again, meaning I'm somewhere in between being young and being old, or that maybe my generation is getting younger and I'm lost in translation. Either way, the nightlife and I have grown apart.

Perhaps I shouldn't have started thrill seeking in 21+ clubs as an underage teen, I should've partied a little less in college or club hopped a little less when I moved back home. While I enjoy getting dressed up, dancing and a few drinks here and there, I could really live without: the large, sweaty crowds; the long lines; the ridiculous cover charges; the crunk music;  the kids; the creeps and the barsexuals.

And I find that sometimes for me to stomach the club setting I end up being the drunk, hot girl...rarely, but still I don't want to have those nights I can barley remember.

So I'm exploring some old ways with a new little twist to enjoy the nightlife again.

The dinner and a movie setting...[Muvico, ICON] perfect for g.n.o, bromances and everything in between...sure I can't shake my groove thang but it's good food, good entertainment and with the right group of people, it's a really good time.

The bowling alley, or should I say "club bowl"...[10 Pin, Lucky Strike] upscale bowling alleys provide the ambiance of a club without the "kids" & "creeps" and  if the music is right, I'm subject to bust a few moves.

Winetasting...helllllooo Coopershawk...okay so no bootyshaking and it doesn't jump all night but it's a tasteful way to get overserved lol and it's only as fun as the folks you bring along.

.....And these days I'm all for an old fashioned house party and music that reminds of the days when I was just a kid wishing to be a grown up. And don't let there be a strobe light...can we say tearing up the dance floor! lol

Although finding a good club is like finding a needle in a haystack, I haven't given up hope yet but I am becoming reinventive. Eat your heart out Usher! #yeahisaid!t

No Longer "Waiting", It's Time to Breathe

Author Terry McMillan is back with a new book! On September 7th, she released "Getting to Happy", the follow up to the 1992 novel turned movie 'Waiting to Exhale'.

The four women are back this time, with different perspectives on life. Bernadine, Gloria, Savannah and Robin who are no longer middle-aged, but now into their 50's, or almost, are dealing with failed relationships, failed businesses, kids and even grandkids this time around. But still with same sisterhood and sass, the ladies who were once waiting to exhale, are finally learning to breathe in 'Getting to Happy'.


McMillan also announced that she is currently working on the screenplay for this novel.

She is currently on her book tour and will stop in Chicago later this month.


***Chicago, IL - 7:00 PM Monday, September 20

Barnes & Noble

297 Oakbrook Center

Oakbrook, IL 60523

Barnes & Noble

Waiting to Exhale Flashback

Young Black Athletes...the Lost Ones

    Straight up scholar or straight up sports?  Given the choice which would you choose or would have chosen?  I stand by thoughts that I'd send my child to school on an academic scholarship or on academic merit before I let or allow him/her to believe sports is the way to go for college.
    Families who allow their kids to attend college for sports aren't necessarily wrong but it is particularly dangerous in the black community.  I remember having the conversation before with a person who was a young, black male who was attending school on a basketball scholarship and strongly felt that for many black young men coming from where he came from, it was the only way out.  But was it, is it? 

He wasn't the only one who felt that way, as I've talked to many others who felt the same way, many of whom shared the same NBA hoop dream, had been heavily pampered and classroom rules had been bent or broken; leaving academics as the least of their worries. In fact, so much time was spent focusing on their NCAA careers,(a huge money making scheme for universities) that when basketball or football was removed from the equation, they were pretty much left with nothing...well, just their books like the average student. Need I point out that in 2008 NCAA reported the graduation rates for blacks in football and basketball were less than 50 percent in each sport.

Professor Billy Hawkins of the University of Georgia discusses in his new book how black athletes are being exploited in the intercollegiate athletic world. Hawkins even describes the experiences of black athletes to that of slaves on a plantation...that's deep. Here's a little more on that: http://www.bvonmoney.com/2010/06/19/black-scholars-black-athletes/

Could it be that sports scholarships for young black men is the equivalence of welfare to the black community? And why is it that we allow young men to believe that this is "their way out"? Just as much emphasis that is placed on a kid with exceptional basketball skills to be a great athlete, should be placed on them to be the next president or geneticist.  They should be taught to be great at one thing outside of being great at another. 

Take a look at the young men at the Urban Prep Academy in Chicago, who participated in a Signing Day on May 25th, and instead of donning sports jerseys and hats of their new teams, they proudly put on baseball caps from the universities they'll be attending this fall.  On June 12, 2010, the entire senior class of 107 graduated, all of whom have been accepted into colleges and universities. See video below:




We have to help each other dream bigger than the court or field, and tackle what's really important in life. To educate is to empower, there's promise in power, there's only potential in playing. #YEAHISAID!T

So here's the thing...

It seems that I am not very disciplined with blogging. I write...I have been writing....just most of it doesn't make it here. The interesting part is that if I wrote half of the things I think about writing...well there would just be too many for folks to keep up...of course if I was generating traffic. But I'm going to make a personal vow to share my thoughts and a piece of my world right here....I mean it's the perfect place to think out loud...stay tuned...better yet tune IN!............and out.

All the Single Parents, All the Single Parents (nope not a song)

Was Ann Coulter just bored when she decided to plot her attack on single parents?! Or was it a desperate plea for attention?!
After watching her banter on "The View", I felt almost as inflamed as the hosts on the show; however I quickly curbed my enthusiasm after formulating that she just might be entertained by all the irritation, caused by her ignorance.

It appears that she is resorting to "shock jock" techniques to help carry over her opinion to a larger audience. When she sat down to have this conversation with her peers, it must have gone very well; which left her intrigued to share her gospel with the rest of the world. Sadly, not too many folks are singing her praises, at least not the SP's.
Sure anyone can throw down a bunch of statistics to help prove a point, especially when things are examined from one side, but it presents a very uneven argument. So I'm gathering from her statements and statistics that because single parents are single parents, they raise criminals, meaning what…married parents don't because there's a ring in place?

Interesting enough I stumbled across an article on Sarah Chapman, the mother of Sean "P. Diddy" Combs' eldest daughter Chance Combs, only to find some disheartening comments posted beneath it. 

Now I don't agree with women sleeping with other peoples' men, (I will make my argument on that another day, another time), but I find it absolutely sad that people share Ann Coulter's view; and not only that but people still believe kids and marriage go hand in hand. I perfectly understand that it is ideal for man and woman to get married and then have children but as we know the cookie doesn't always crumble that way and hasn't for centuries.
The ladies who commented on the post seemed to feel that Kim Porter, Diddy's on again-off again girlfriend and mother to three of his children, deserved to be cheated on. A lot of their discontent was merely based on the fact that she was not married to him, had kids by him, which only made her "baby mama" and therefore should've expected him to step out and do his thing.

WHOA THERE! I had to take a minute to gather myself upon reading such rubbish. I mean were they that idiotic to believe that she didn't deserve a certain level of respect because she didn't marry him?! The bottom line is this…
She was his WOMAN!!! Not his bitch, his hoe or his cheese on the side, someone he obviously loves and she loves him back and the MOTHER of and to his children. Whatever her reasons for not marrying him were, are her business; perhaps she spared herself of the Hollywood divorce or was even just fine being his girlfriend.
I mean really if she had married him would that have stopped him from being what he truly is? Or would she have joined that large pool of naïve women, who marry knowing what their man is capable of just to avoid being looked upon as the "B.M."?
The divorce rate is up, (what do you say to that Annie?!) and more and more people men and women are becoming single parents. Does it make them bad people? No. Does it automatically mean we should hold a cell block for their kids? Heck no. It simply means that single parenthood is becoming a commonality rather by choice or by circumstance.
There are some people who really do choose being a single parent versus going through all the other motions society and Ann Coulter seem to think is more acceptable. At the end of the day I'd rather see happy, healthy single parenting than to see abusive, damaging mommy and daddy is married parenting.
We as people have to prioritize, married or not when it comes to parenting. When you are a single parent you do have a lot more to juggle; some can handle it, some can't. The flaw in single parenting isn't being a single parent; rather it's dropping the ball. You have your hands tied fulfilling all of your rightful duties, but you also have to make sure that you are doing all that you can for your children if not more to ensure they stay on the right paths in life.
Regardless of ones' marital status, or no matter what the circumstances are, I say whatever floats your boat just make sure that the child or children are taken care of and that you take care of yourself as well. Be peaceful.

Welcome to my world: My Disclaimer

I must warn you that my thoughts are very provactive (not in a breast/thigh kinda way). But hopefully will leave you forming questions, opinions and so forth. Oh and I encourage telling me off too. Oh and feel free to ask for advice(my opinion) because I loooove giving it.

Welcome to my world (part of it...)